It is, gale force winds interspersed with heavy rain, I suppose that covers most of the country, at least I live up a hill so no chance of flooding, well if it did happen Glasgow, being down at sea level would be under 300 foot of water along with most of The Clyde Valley.

In the middle of ironing the ironing table collapsed, screws, springs and bits of plastic all over the kitchen floor, one good thing, I had nearly finished, only four pairs of socks to do. Away to B&Q to survey their vast selection, about 20, one level up on the rack, all the same type, different colour covers, one was blue, right at the back, and I wanted that one, didn't half annoy the assistant that had to get it down for me, I was tempted to say that I had changed my mind but he didn't look like he could take a joke.

Drilled holes in the large logs that I collected ready to slip in the mushroom spawn after I have half buried them in the garden, the mushroom spawn was a Christmas present, I was expecting a Wei from them.

Three one-liners, stupid yes, but so what,

Prices are going up since the European currency came along, you used to be able to spend a penny, but now it's called 'euronating'!

Why did the scarecrow get a bonus from his boss? Because he was out standing in his field.

How does the Pope cover his Ebay debts. A: Papal

Going out now, staying weekend at Hazels, means that I can have a drink or two, or three, or four as I won't have to drive home.

Have a good weekend all.