Midday Monday, recovering from my long weekend of excesses, about 14 pages of my friends blogs to catch up on, but before I do that here is a bit of humour, too bloody close to the truth for some of us.

THIS IS HAPPENING RIGHT HERE IN OUR OWN
COUNTRY!

We Must Stop This Immediately !

Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper . Groceries are heavier . And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was
dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!

And, you know, people are less considerate now,
especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just
keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I
am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the
same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day
and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the
poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I
glanced at my own reflection . . well, REALLY NOW - even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives
so fast these days! You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto
the freeway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out
awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are
less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start
labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices?
The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank. Do they think I actually
"believe" the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself
weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're
fooling?

I'd like to call up someone in
authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the
phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in
there!

All I can do is pass along this warning:
WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!

Unless something drastic
happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful
indignities.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE CAN
GET THIS CONSPIRACY STOPPED!